Mama Tried

Read the book, read the book

That was my first sentence. It makes me so happy that Nathan is such a big reader- he goes to bed with several Richard Scarry books every night and has a few original Curious George stories memorized.  And also guilty, because I definitely did not spend as much of James' first year reading to him like I did Nathan- in fact, mostly I just counted James being in the room when I read to Nathan as reading time.

James, however, has decided that he needs to be read more age appropriate books and is taking full advantage of living in a house full of them. When he sees a board book, he grabs it crawls over and shakes it at me, his way of saying, "Read the book! Read the book!"  His favorite book, hands down, is Sandra Boynton's Doggies (which he can totally read, because he is a genius- when you open the first page, he says, "Woof!" Of course he also says that whenever you open any Sandra Boynton book.)  A close second is Slam Dunk, which he can also "read." ("Ball! Ball! Ball!")

He also wants to read whatever Nathan is reading, and they are both currently obsessed with this book. So we spend a lot of time talking about R2D2 and C3PO and I spend a lot of time answering questions like, "What's a New Hope, Mommy?" and overhearing things like "Hurry, run, Thomas, down the track before Darth Vader gonna GET YOU!" I really thought I had a few years before the Star Wars obsession kicked in but apparently it starts young. 

Less Mean Mommy

So, last night I bit the bullet and put both boys down together and resolved to not stay in the room anymore no matter what Nathan did. If he got up and left the room, I'd return him to bed silently. If he woke up James, I would not go in. If he started sounding like he was bothering James by poking in his crib, I would go in, return Nathan to bed silently, and leave James to resettle himself. The italicized portion was the part of my plan that was different from anything I'd tried. I'd been rocking James to sleep and once James started sleeping through the night saw no reason to change that. And I did not think his brother's shenanigans should make him suffer.  But I was at the end of my rope.

And-- Nathan barely got out of bed. He did yell, and wake James, but he stayed in his bed. And it was poor James who cried for almost 45 minutes before settling.  I felt awful but also relieved, as it was the easiest time I had getting them to bed in months. Tonight James cried a little less and Nathan again, yelled but did not try to get out of or jump on his bed, which shocked me. And confirmed that my attention is not conducive to him getting to sleep- if my presence quieted or calmed him, I would have stuck with it, but whenever I am there at bedtime I just rile him up. 

Fortunately James is so easygoing I think he will adjust soon.

In a less mean mommy trick, I have gotten much better with brushing Nathan's teeth. Turns out if I narrate the whole thing like he is at the dentist ("Okay, now, over there is my train table, and I have a play kitchen, and now look up at the tv, would you like to watch this or should we put on a Thomas movie for you?") he'll totally let me brush his teeth really well. Afterwards Mommy Dentist gives him a pretend balloon and then he asks me to hold it. "Mommy Dentist, can you hold my balloon? I have to take my bath and I don't want it to get wep.*"

*He pronounce words that end in t like they end in p, so wet is wep, mat is map, etc. It's pretty cute.

Mean Mommy

I did not really realize that I've been a very patient, kind, and loving mother up until a few weeks ago. But y'all, I have! I have always been really nice and never viciously yelled at my children or felt murderous rage, and I did not realize that was a big deal until I snapped.

Bedtime is doing me in. Now that Nathan is in a toddler bed, and sharing a room with James, I feel like I am screwed anyway I can think of to solve his refusal to stay in bed and be quiet. When he wakes up James at bedtime I feel especially rageful, but I also feel rageful when he's been jack-in-the-bedrooming for over an hour. I don't get it- when he was in the crib we never had these problems, but we also don't have this problem at naptime, so I don't know. I've moved bedtime later, and earlier, and later again. I've tried putting him and James down at the same time. I've tried putting him down first. I am scared to put a gate on his door because I know he'll just wake up James and then I'll go nuts.  My mother suggested staying down in his room w/him, but a)I don't want to stay in his room til 8:30 everynight (that's an hour and a half!) and b)when I stay in his room for three minutes he still jumps and yells.  I'm leaning towards moving James out of their temporarily, if we can fit the pack and play in our room.

Ugh. It is just making me crazy. Even "good" nights he's still out of his bed a lot, I just don't have to put myself in my bedroom and throw a pillow against the wall to calm down enough to deal. I've tried bribery and threats and everything in between and I want to kill Supernanny.

It's not the worst thing that could ever happen but it is by far the worst thing happening to ME (and the second worst isn't even close, the second worst is that when I am folding laundry I have a hard time telling James' pants from Nathan's shorts) and I just need to vent lest I explode.

Things That Are Happening

I cannot think of a coherent post, but when has that ever stopped me?

-James is talking. Dog, more, all done, Bana (banana), Dada, Hi, and Down (which he will say if you say Up- he likes to stand in your lap and you say "Up!" and he'll say, "DOWN!" and sit down, which is the height of hilarity I guess).  And this morning he signed more while saying Bana, does that count as a sentence? 

-Nathan is a HANDFUL but he is at the stage where he explains everything to you. I was out of town and Grammy took him to the mall every day so when I came back, he wanted to go to the mall and then he wanted to explain all about how the whole mall works, like a)I hadn't taken him there a billion times myself and b)I don't know a thing or two about malls. "Mommy, if we leave the stroller in the car we can take the escalator. They have elevators and escalators. On escalators you push the button. First we can get cookies and second ride the train."  

Sleep is our big issue YET AGAIN. James has gotten up, teething I think, for an hour or two at a time the past few nights. And Nathan takes an hour and a half to settle in at bedtime, jumping out of bed ninetytwo times and if we're unlucky, yelling and waking James. I am attempting to bribe him, but that and threats both seem to not work very well. I am hoping both things will just improve with time at this point and if they won't I don't want to know about it.